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The Temperament God Gave You: The Classic Key to Knowing Yourself, Getting Along with Others, and Growing Closer to the Lord

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Unlock the secret of your personality and learn how to be a better spouse, parent, friend, and Christian. This book offers a Catholic understanding of the four ancient temperaments that will bring you closer to God and help you discover the path to holiness that's right for you. Learn how to identify and understand the four temperaments that determine our reactions, guide Unlock the secret of your personality and learn how to be a better spouse, parent, friend, and Christian. This book offers a Catholic understanding of the four ancient temperaments that will bring you closer to God and help you discover the path to holiness that's right for you. Learn how to identify and understand the four temperaments that determine our reactions, guide our choices, color our understanding, and serve as the foundation of our moral and spiritual life.


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Unlock the secret of your personality and learn how to be a better spouse, parent, friend, and Christian. This book offers a Catholic understanding of the four ancient temperaments that will bring you closer to God and help you discover the path to holiness that's right for you. Learn how to identify and understand the four temperaments that determine our reactions, guide Unlock the secret of your personality and learn how to be a better spouse, parent, friend, and Christian. This book offers a Catholic understanding of the four ancient temperaments that will bring you closer to God and help you discover the path to holiness that's right for you. Learn how to identify and understand the four temperaments that determine our reactions, guide our choices, color our understanding, and serve as the foundation of our moral and spiritual life.

30 review for The Temperament God Gave You: The Classic Key to Knowing Yourself, Getting Along with Others, and Growing Closer to the Lord

  1. 5 out of 5

    Chelsea

    SO AWESOME! I can't believe how much understanding there is of people's temperaments. This book is not about personality but about our natural reactions to stimuli. How cool! PLEASE READ THIS BOOK if you have ever been interested in getting to know yourself better. It also has great information about the best ways to treat and interact with people of other temperaments in all types of relationship situations. The Temperament God Gave you is really a diamond in the rough. SO AWESOME! I can't believe how much understanding there is of people's temperaments. This book is not about personality but about our natural reactions to stimuli. How cool! PLEASE READ THIS BOOK if you have ever been interested in getting to know yourself better. It also has great information about the best ways to treat and interact with people of other temperaments in all types of relationship situations. The Temperament God Gave you is really a diamond in the rough.

  2. 5 out of 5

    J.

    I found this book to be helpful, prior to my coming back to the Catholic Faith I was trying really hard to know who I was, I tried the Enneagram and trans-personal psychological methods to figure out who I was, I went to assessment tests grounded in Jungian Psychology too, only to still feel like as if something was missing. It was only after finding out that the MTBI 16-Types can be reduced to the 4 Classical Temperaments that I really considered getting this book. When I opened this book, I ha I found this book to be helpful, prior to my coming back to the Catholic Faith I was trying really hard to know who I was, I tried the Enneagram and trans-personal psychological methods to figure out who I was, I went to assessment tests grounded in Jungian Psychology too, only to still feel like as if something was missing. It was only after finding out that the MTBI 16-Types can be reduced to the 4 Classical Temperaments that I really considered getting this book. When I opened this book, I had this sense of clarity about who I was and where I was going that I never had before. This book makes a great primer to understand each of the 4 Temperaments and from there to know what the strengths and weaknesses are that each temperament has only then to know how best to address each temperaments. It also helps to know how to interact with other people, including children of the particular temperaments too. This book gives a balance between the psychological and theological so as to understand how God's Grace and the Sacramental and Interior Life of the Church Tradition can help better form each temperament so that they arrive at the full stature they were intended to become.

  3. 5 out of 5

    Colleen

    This is one of my favorite books EVER. It really helped me learn about myself, as well as my friends, my enemies (it helped me understand them), my spouse and my children (very important to me.) My book club read this book and it was a VERY lively discussion, to say the least. If you wish to know yourself, read this book and C.S. Lewis's book, The Screwtape Letters. !!! CC This is one of my favorite books EVER. It really helped me learn about myself, as well as my friends, my enemies (it helped me understand them), my spouse and my children (very important to me.) My book club read this book and it was a VERY lively discussion, to say the least. If you wish to know yourself, read this book and C.S. Lewis's book, The Screwtape Letters. !!! CC

  4. 5 out of 5

    Regina Doman

    I recommend this book to any writer interested in learning how to build characters. It gives fascinating insights into how other people think. As well as learning to understand yourself: I learned a lot!

  5. 5 out of 5

    Kelly

    I was recommended this book by a therapist. I was honestly a bit skeptical at first, because - especially as someone with an advanced degree in psychology (have a Masters, going for a PhD), I am often frustrated by the sheer amount of weight popular culture and popular writers put on other “personality tests” - everything from the Myers-Briggs test to astrological signs. The authors of the book are more nuanced in their claims, though, making clear multiple times that everyone has elements of al I was recommended this book by a therapist. I was honestly a bit skeptical at first, because - especially as someone with an advanced degree in psychology (have a Masters, going for a PhD), I am often frustrated by the sheer amount of weight popular culture and popular writers put on other “personality tests” - everything from the Myers-Briggs test to astrological signs. The authors of the book are more nuanced in their claims, though, making clear multiple times that everyone has elements of all the temperaments and that temperaments don’t control or determine everything in your life. Most of their insights and advice seem very sound, especially on spiritual subjects, but they also don’t oversell anything or claim that knowing your own temperament (I’m a melancholic-phlegmatic — no surprise there) or anyone else’s will allow you to magically fix all of your problems, like lots of pop-psych authors on similar topics do. The book was also fairly repetitive. I’m not expecting any kind of dramatic life change, but I think gaining the knowledge and understanding in this book was worthwhile.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Erik

    Yes, four temperaments is a bit of a gross classification, but just like birth order, these classifications can help one to understand and empathize with others. This book carefully delineated the characteristics of the four temperaments, making it more practical that other books that talk about profiles in vague terms. There were many "ah-ha" moments for me while reading this book when I recognized myself or Wendy in the descriptions. These moments were confirmed when the evaluation questionnai Yes, four temperaments is a bit of a gross classification, but just like birth order, these classifications can help one to understand and empathize with others. This book carefully delineated the characteristics of the four temperaments, making it more practical that other books that talk about profiles in vague terms. There were many "ah-ha" moments for me while reading this book when I recognized myself or Wendy in the descriptions. These moments were confirmed when the evaluation questionnaire provided at the end put me squarely in the temperament and secondary temperament I had surmised earlier. After describing the characteristics of people with the four temperaments, this book went the next step and discussed how a person of each temperament could best interact with (1) others, (2) your spouse, in particular, and (3) children with each of the four temperaments. It then discussed how each temperament affects spiritually, so one can avoid common pitfalls and use one's talents to grow.

  7. 4 out of 5

    Mary

    The cover design doesn't make you want to read it, but if you are Christian and interested in why you are the way you are, definitely give it a read. To someone who is intensely interested in the Myers-Briggs type indicator and the enneagram, as I am, this book is quite valuable. It's not about fitting people into slots or simply categorizing ourselves and others. For one thing, nobody fits entirely into any one category; we're all unique blends of factors and tendencies. For another, this kind The cover design doesn't make you want to read it, but if you are Christian and interested in why you are the way you are, definitely give it a read. To someone who is intensely interested in the Myers-Briggs type indicator and the enneagram, as I am, this book is quite valuable. It's not about fitting people into slots or simply categorizing ourselves and others. For one thing, nobody fits entirely into any one category; we're all unique blends of factors and tendencies. For another, this kind of understanding between individuals can't help but harmonize our relationships and bring us together. A choleric parent can come off as a boot camp instructor when all they really want is for great and dynamic things to happen to their kids. A phlegmatic friend can be seen as lazy or unassertive when all they really want is for everyone to chill out, have fun, and get along. Being open and honest about one's own foibles and drives, in combination with reading Art & Laraine Bennett's book, can lead to great satisfaction and a clearer understanding of human interaction. This book has the added benefit of being directed toward those with a religious-Christian point of view, bringing in vocation and prayer to an otherwise potentially dry and scientific subject. A great resource!

  8. 5 out of 5

    Crizzle

    Spriggles and I mirror each other's personalities! I am a sanguine-phlegmatic, and he is a phlegmatic-sanguine (aka the best two types;). And everyone always wondered how we even got together, since we seem so different! We both just like friends and fun! It was fun reading the synopses of the different types and seeing friends and family as these personality types. Molly is a choloric, of course. Different sections showed you how children behave as each of the four personalities, how to best mot Spriggles and I mirror each other's personalities! I am a sanguine-phlegmatic, and he is a phlegmatic-sanguine (aka the best two types;). And everyone always wondered how we even got together, since we seem so different! We both just like friends and fun! It was fun reading the synopses of the different types and seeing friends and family as these personality types. Molly is a choloric, of course. Different sections showed you how children behave as each of the four personalities, how to best motivate them, your personality strengths and weaknesses in the different parenting/child personality combos and spousal combinations.

  9. 4 out of 5

    Veronica Kim

    If this book doesn't make you a better spouse, sister/brother, son/daughter, parent, friend, coworker, and follower of Christ, it'll at least make you much less confused about why people are the way they are. Gives great insight into the psychology and spirituality of each temperament, including how/why each thrives and dwindles. I tend to agonize over my flaws but this book made me more forgiving of them and at the same time doubly empowered to counter them (typical sanguine-phlegmatic). The bo If this book doesn't make you a better spouse, sister/brother, son/daughter, parent, friend, coworker, and follower of Christ, it'll at least make you much less confused about why people are the way they are. Gives great insight into the psychology and spirituality of each temperament, including how/why each thrives and dwindles. I tend to agonize over my flaws but this book made me more forgiving of them and at the same time doubly empowered to counter them (typical sanguine-phlegmatic). The book as a whole highlights the complementarity and necessity of all the crazy people in our lives. Embrace em!

  10. 5 out of 5

    Jara

    I'm finished with The Temperament God Gave: Excellent descriptions of the 4 temperaments and how each relates to God, self, and others. The only issue I have is that the authors dismiss the melancholic-sanguine and choleric-phlegmatic combinations as "impossible" in an "emotionally healthy individual" even after quoting that "Grace builds upon nature." With God, all things are possible! I am melancholic-sanguine and, ironically, so is this book's editor. I'm finished with The Temperament God Gave: Excellent descriptions of the 4 temperaments and how each relates to God, self, and others. The only issue I have is that the authors dismiss the melancholic-sanguine and choleric-phlegmatic combinations as "impossible" in an "emotionally healthy individual" even after quoting that "Grace builds upon nature." With God, all things are possible! I am melancholic-sanguine and, ironically, so is this book's editor.

  11. 5 out of 5

    Clare D' Lune

    AHHHH!!!! My mom and her book club read this book, and now I want to know (At least a year later) WILL WE EVER HEAR THE END TO IT?!?!?!? haha Now EVERYONE has been put into a catigory. It's actually pretty funny and fun! Everyones picking what they think they are, and they also have a test thing in the back to do, if you aren't sure about your temperment.... AHHHH!!!! My mom and her book club read this book, and now I want to know (At least a year later) WILL WE EVER HEAR THE END TO IT?!?!?!? haha Now EVERYONE has been put into a catigory. It's actually pretty funny and fun! Everyones picking what they think they are, and they also have a test thing in the back to do, if you aren't sure about your temperment....

  12. 5 out of 5

    Annabellissima

    Cool book about personalities, temperaments, and how each person can relate to others depending on their temperament. From a Catholic perspective. Very nice. Covers marriage, children, etc. I enjoyed it a lot.

  13. 4 out of 5

    Gwen

    I don't have much farther to go on this one. Lots of great insights into behavior and motivations of family and friends. Our onetime book discussion group had a great time talking about this and even looking at our own temperaments. I don't have much farther to go on this one. Lots of great insights into behavior and motivations of family and friends. Our onetime book discussion group had a great time talking about this and even looking at our own temperaments.

  14. 5 out of 5

    Emily

    When trying to figure how what's getting in the way of moving forward in the spiritual life, this book was suggested to me. It's a great introduction into how our temperaments can help and hinder our path towards holiness. Highly recommend to anyone wanting to dive deeper into why you do certain things a certain way. When trying to figure how what's getting in the way of moving forward in the spiritual life, this book was suggested to me. It's a great introduction into how our temperaments can help and hinder our path towards holiness. Highly recommend to anyone wanting to dive deeper into why you do certain things a certain way.

  15. 4 out of 5

    Tienne

    This book made such a difference in my life and my marriage! It was a joy to finally discover that my "flaws" were really just personality traits that could be channeled to good purpose. I had spent so much of my life being criticized for my sensitivity, strong emotional reactions, and deep concern for other's feelings and happiness, only to discover that my melancholic/sanguine temperament can actually be an asset in connecting with other people and helping them. This book also taught me to vie This book made such a difference in my life and my marriage! It was a joy to finally discover that my "flaws" were really just personality traits that could be channeled to good purpose. I had spent so much of my life being criticized for my sensitivity, strong emotional reactions, and deep concern for other's feelings and happiness, only to discover that my melancholic/sanguine temperament can actually be an asset in connecting with other people and helping them. This book also taught me to view my husband in a different light. Understanding him (and myself) has strengthened our relationship, and I am deeply grateful to this book for its assistance!

  16. 4 out of 5

    Upstatemamma

    This book was very interesting. It really taught me a lot about myself. In some ways it hit me harder because of some personal things that made me really look at my life. But even without that it is very insightful and talks about lots of relationships and how they are affected by temperament. I really think this book is a good read. And while it is a Catholic book and comes at things from that perspective I think it would be relevant to anyone.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Dorothy

    I read this book for my parenting class. It was definitely interesting although I struggled for awhile to find my temperament. I am pretty sure of both my primary and secondary temperaments and I think I've pegged both Todd and James. I'm still working on Cate. There are a lot of good insights in the book and I think it will be a good resource going forward. Beth, I think you would really like this book, both from a psychological as well as religious aspect. I read this book for my parenting class. It was definitely interesting although I struggled for awhile to find my temperament. I am pretty sure of both my primary and secondary temperaments and I think I've pegged both Todd and James. I'm still working on Cate. There are a lot of good insights in the book and I think it will be a good resource going forward. Beth, I think you would really like this book, both from a psychological as well as religious aspect.

  18. 5 out of 5

    Sian

    This was my introduction to the 4 temperaments. I thought it was really good, even if your not approaching it from a religious standpoint. I wonder that these 4 temperaments, that we are roughly each born with in the genetic roulette that is our conception, somehow compliment or make know in human creation each of gods 4 primary attributes, Love, Justice, Wisdom and Power. Anyone have any personal thoughts on that?

  19. 5 out of 5

    Natalie

    Loved this book. It was uncanny reading the descriptions of my temperament. Great to help understand other people and why they act in certain ways (as well as myself). Should be required reading for every couple. This book is helping me to understand my husband better - I wish I'd read it 16 years ago! Loved this book. It was uncanny reading the descriptions of my temperament. Great to help understand other people and why they act in certain ways (as well as myself). Should be required reading for every couple. This book is helping me to understand my husband better - I wish I'd read it 16 years ago!

  20. 5 out of 5

    Kylie

    Brilliant. Honestly life-changing. I learnt so much about myself and others in this book. I feel like it taught me empathy as well as how to better the faults I've long identified in myself. No person should go through life without reading this book! Even if you're not religious, you will LOVE it. Brilliant. Honestly life-changing. I learnt so much about myself and others in this book. I feel like it taught me empathy as well as how to better the faults I've long identified in myself. No person should go through life without reading this book! Even if you're not religious, you will LOVE it.

  21. 4 out of 5

    Eileen W

    A small group of us read this after Walking With Purpose ended. It was very interesting. You find yourself analyzing the personality type of yourself and those close to you. Not sure I'll remember all the ways to relate and motivate the different personality combinations, but I'll save it to reference. A small group of us read this after Walking With Purpose ended. It was very interesting. You find yourself analyzing the personality type of yourself and those close to you. Not sure I'll remember all the ways to relate and motivate the different personality combinations, but I'll save it to reference.

  22. 5 out of 5

    Tom

    Interesting and insightful book about the temperaments that exist in all people. I enjoyed learning the strengths and weaknesses of my dominant temperament, which could help in the future. As the title states, it is a religiously oriented book, but the psychological insights within it should be valuable to anyone.

  23. 5 out of 5

    Lucy

    A wonderful book to understand those around you as well as yourself; Explains why different people react differently in the same situations. As well as much,much more you cannot put it down once you start!!!

  24. 4 out of 5

    Joyce

    Very readable guide to the four temperaments in a Christian context. I appreciate the different parts about knowing oneself, knowing one's spouse, knowing one's children, and motivating each of the temperaments. The Bennetts are very thorough, but also kind of repetitive. Very readable guide to the four temperaments in a Christian context. I appreciate the different parts about knowing oneself, knowing one's spouse, knowing one's children, and motivating each of the temperaments. The Bennetts are very thorough, but also kind of repetitive.

  25. 5 out of 5

    Dapo Adesiyun

    Great read! A very enlightening book on temperaments and how knowledge of them will ensure smoother interactions between people and a deeper understanding of how various people think, react and work.

  26. 5 out of 5

    Emily

    Really interesting book, enjoyed reading it throughly. Ultimately I think I determined my temperament through reading better than the test in the back (I'm a sanguine-phlegmatic)- but I still think my highlights are going to be a helpful guide in building a fulfilling and spiritual life Really interesting book, enjoyed reading it throughly. Ultimately I think I determined my temperament through reading better than the test in the back (I'm a sanguine-phlegmatic)- but I still think my highlights are going to be a helpful guide in building a fulfilling and spiritual life

  27. 4 out of 5

    Thomas Sheridan

    A quick and enlightening read offering solid guidance on how to grow in ways that are natural and unnatural to us. The authors have done an excellent job in helping us the readers to navigate life with God, Spouse, Children, Community, and self.

  28. 5 out of 5

    Kathleen

    This was given to me as a gift, but I actually found it interesting. I apparently am phlegmatic melancholic.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Jon

    I haven't read this entire book, however, I have read a lot of it and it is very insightful. A good read! I haven't read this entire book, however, I have read a lot of it and it is very insightful. A good read!

  30. 4 out of 5

    Colleenduggan

    Wished I had it when I worked...would have totally changed my dynamic with those whom I found difficult.

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